Intergalactic

Transcript
(Episode opens at the elimination ceremony)

Granite: Okay uh so the votes went 2 - 0.

Steve: Alright everybody aside from the losers will vote off one of the two losers.

Vanessa: Well who lost?

Steve: You and Purps!

Purps: Dammit! I knew it was a bad choice for me to insert myself into my own show!

Steve: Everybody else, please vote.

Jenkins: Hey wait, what’s that?

Granite: What’s what?

(The house nears a glowing spiral)

Triton: What the f-

(The spiral pulls the house inside of it and everything glows colors beyond the human imagination as space/time bends and spits the house out at the edge of the universe)

Granite: Dammit not again. Okay guys well uh go ahead and vote!

Girly Teengril: We already did!

Granite: Oh okay. Wow, unanimous first vote. Purps, I’m sorry but you’ve been evicted!

Purps: Well shit. Wait there’s no stage, where do I exit to?

Granite: The doors now lead into the rocket ship. You’ll be staying there.

Purps: Bye guys.

(Purps leaves)’

Granite: Alright, next challenge. For your next challenge, everybody has been randomly paired up with another duo. The duos will battle each other in a classic game of star dust collecting! Whichever duo collects more space dust wins and moves on to the next round.

(Round One: Shitward and Sully vs Gale and Perch; Krabs and Shicowa vs Girly Teengirl and HBRS; Vanessa vs Keanu and Motlu; Mindy and Triton vs Grandpa SquarePants and Jenkins)

Granite: First up, Shitward and Sully will take on Gale and Perch.

Perch: Gale don’t forget your space suit!

Gale: Oh yeah.

Granite: (opens gate to space) go!

Shitward: Oh, so that’s what these comically large nets are for. What the hell is that?

Granite: What?

Steve: Oh so that’s where Alex ended up.

(Alex’s dead body is floating through space)

Steve: Well looks like TDS is cancelled. Hooray, we knocked out some competition.

Alex: (wakes up) Wait what.

Steve: Oh wait, this event hasn’t aired on TDS yet. Uhhhhhhhh.

(Shitward and Sully return to the house with a lot of space dust, followed by Gale and Perch)

Sully: No way they beat us.

Granite: Yeah. Gale and Perch, you guys lose.

Alex: I need to get back to the final three!

Steve: Bye.

(Alex throws a long distance enderpearl)

Granite: Next battle is Krabs and Shicowa up against Girly Teengirl and HBRS.

HBRS: Today I’m Scott!

Krabs: That’s ncie Bill.

HBRS: I hate my existence.

Granite: Go collect star dust!

(Krabs takes off and collects plenty of space dust, and returns before anybody else gets a chance to get some)

Granite: This challenge is unbalanced so I’ll make the next round completely different!

Shicowa: Oh shoot.

Granite: You guys won though.

Krabs: Alright! I need to win the money this competition awards.

Granite: Next up we have Vanessa vs Keanu and Motlu!

Vanessa: I forfeit, this is too easy for them to win.

Keanu: Fair point:

Granite: Okay then. Well our final mashup for this round is Mindy and Triton up against Grandpa SquarePants and Jenkins. Gods up against buff grandfathers.

Triton: Damn right.

(Mindy snaps her fingers and space dust floods the ship)

Jenkins: Shane we lost, but that was impressive Mindy!

Mindy: Thanks but I’ve got a man. His name is Patrick Star.

Jenkins: Dammit.

Mindy: Plus you’re a little old, no offense.

Granite: Well let’s move into round two. Time to change this challenge up a lot.

(To be continued)