Travis the Tramp

Travis the Tramp is the twenty-eighth episode of SBFW Quest. It aired on December 15, 2019, and was written by FireMatch.

Transcript
(Dan is reading a Playboy magazine)

Dan: (giggling) This is the best thing I’ve read in my life!

Crazy: Oh brother.

Dan: What? It’s really hot! Wanna see it?

Crazy: No!

Travis: Yeah, that stuff really makes me want Image’s-

Crazy: TRAVIS! When did you get here? Get out!

Travis: I’m not listening to an 11-year-old.

Dan: What are you doing here anyway?

Travis: I’m here to sell y’all supplies. You know, to apologize for destroying your guys’ lives and stuff.

Dan: Sounds believable enough to me.

Crazy: Well I’m not buying it. I’m telling everyone else.

(Cut to Crazy telling other people)

Matchy: What the hell? This has to be some sort of farce.

Purple: Sounds pretty cool to me.

Cici: I don’t care.

Rocky: Wait, I still exist? Wow.

Travis: Damn fools don’t know a good trade when they see one. I’m selling muskets for a pound a piece!

Purple: I’ll take your entire stock!

Travis: ...I only brought one with me. (Purple gives him a pound) I’m rich!

Crazy: No you’re not, you’re just one pound heavier.

Travis: Shut up. Also Purple, I need to see your credentials to prove you’re old enough to own a gun.

Purple: This is the middle ages. I don’t need credentials, I’m 18!

Travis: So am I but people still think I’m 5. Gimme ID.

Purple: Uhh okay. (he hands him his ID)

Travis: DAMN FOOL! You fell right into my trap! Mwahahahaha! (he puts a large bag over Purple’s body and ties it shut)

Matchy: WHAT THE- (he gets captured as well in the blink of an eye)

Crazy: O- (he gets captured too)

(Cut to Ingot’s newly built prison)

Travis: Here’s three damn fools, boss.

Ingot: Great job there, Travis. Crazy, we meet again.

Crazy: Grr….

Ingot: Grr all you want. It won’t stop you from being in the hands of me and my crew.

Ian: I get paid in Weezer albums, it’s great.

Crazy: Well… Weezer sucks!

Ian: WHY YOU LITTLE!

Ingot: Okay, that’s ten more years in the brig for you, 11-year-old.

Crazy: What?!

Ian: You suck, Crazy.

Matchy: No, YOU suck.

Ingot: We can talk about suck all you want AFTER you guys are put into your cells.

Purple: Can I at least have something to write on?

Ingot: Sure, here’s some toilet paper and a pencil. (Purple frowns)

(Meanwhile at Fanonland)

Dan: Where did Purple go? I need to ask him an important question!

Cici: What’s this important question?

Dan: I was gonna ask if Image was single.

Cici: I forgot she existed.

Rocky: Uh, hello?!

Cici: Who was that?

Dan: No idea. Since Purple isn’t here anyway, gotta go look for Image.

Cici: I wanna come with!

(end)