Pawn Shop

Pawn Shop is the eighteenth episode of SBFW Quest. It aired May 22, 2019 and was written by FireMatch.

Transcript
(The episode begins with Crazy reading a book)

Jasbre: What the hell are you reading?

Crazy: Harry Potter and the Mucus Attack.

Jasbre: The fu-

Dan: Guys, guys! I just heard about the best thing ever!

Crazy: We're getting free burritos and pancakes?

Dan: Oddly specific, and no, you idiot, there's a pawn shop nearby!

Crazy: o

Jasbre: What kind of stuff do they have? Who's even running the place?

Jasbre: Guys, let's go to that pawn shop already, they actually might have burritos and pancakes.

Crazy: YES!

Jasbre: Let's go then.

(They head along to the pawn shop, but Crazy secretly stays behind for a secret mission)

(INU is taking a nap, when she hears a rattling noise)

INU: What in the-

Matchy: Shhh, we're helping you escape.

Crazy: o

Ingot: (eating his third breakfast of the day) What's this I hear? INU, shut up!

Matchy: We better hurry.

(They free INU out of her glass cage and run out before Ingot can catch them)

Ingot: INU, if you don't shut up I'm getting out the whip!

(Meanwhile…)

JCM: Welcome to my pawn shop. What do you want?

Jasbre: What do you have?

JCM: Everything I could salvage. Swords, shields, chocolate covered dildos…

Dan: My favorite! (Gets slapped by Bot)

Jasbre: Do you have anything powerful?

JCM: Well I do have this laser gun that shoots out fireballs. (Pulls out the laser gun and uses it on a nearby building, burning it in the process)

Jasbre: We'll take it. How much?

JCM: 100 dollars.

Jasbre: I only got 20, any of you have more?

Bot: I got a 10.

Dan: I left my wallet in my other pants.

Cici: I got two 10s.

(Matchy and Crazy appear, exhausted)

Matchy: Here's… a 50.

JCM: (Takes the 100 bucks) Thank you, have a nice day.

Cici: I see you brought the glistening girl back.

Matchy: Shut up.

INU: Yeah I'm back after… I forgot how long it's been.

Matchy: Forget it, let's just go back.

(Back at Newfanonland SBFW Kingdom)

Jasbre: Guess who's back, everyone.

Travis: (a stain shows up on his crotch) Um, ignore that.

INU: Ew! (Steps away from Travis)

Purps: Travis, you're disgusting.

Travis: I know, and that's what makes me very attractive.

Matchy: (gags)

Crazy: Hey, let's test out this new thingy. (Grabs the laser gun and shoots at a nearby statue, destroying it)

Jasbre: (growls) THAT WAS MY 69TH STATUE OF PETER GRIFFIN!

Crazy: o

(Episode ends after Jasbre attempts to strangle Crazy)