Walk Sidewards Unto Yourself

Walk Sidewards Unto Yourself is the first episode of Bikini Bottom Adventures. It released on January 16, 2017, was written, directed, and filmed by, and was produced by William Underscore Productions Ltd.

Watch it on the BBA YouTube channel here!

Plot
The episode introduces the three main characters - SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward - sitting in Bikini Bottom and doing nothing. SpongeBob wakes himself and Patrick up, and introduces themselves, along with Squidward. Another object in the room also wishes to be introduced, but SpongeBob refuses.

One week later, SpongeBob and Patrick are bored. They pester Squidward, and then look around the room for other things to do. They find an entity named 'Crolophidius of Saragon' on a bookshelf, who tells them about their futures and then vanishes. Later, the three characters head off to bed.

Transcript (in progress)
''[Sound of a camera's record button being pressed. Wide shot of Bikini Bottom, where SpongeBob and Patrick are seen lying on a bed. Squidward is seen sitting in a chair, listening to 'Promises, Promises' by Burt Bacharach.]''

''[Cut to SpongeBob. He gets up.]''

SpongeBob: [yawns] Wow. What a lovely day!

[SpongeBob turns to Patrick.]

SpongeBob: Good morning, Patrick!

Patrick: Huh? Oh! Good morning, SpongeBob!

SpongeBob: Isn't it a lovely day today?

Patrick: Yes, it is, SpongeBob!

[A short pause.]

SpongeBob: Just wonderful.

Patrick: But SpongeBob, shouldn't we introduce this guy to where we are?

SpongeBob: Who? Wh- what guy, I don't see any guy--

[Patrick gestures to the camera.]

Patrick: That guy!

SpongeBob: Oh! Sorry, I didn't see you there for some reason.

[A long pause.]

SpongeBob: ...uh...

[Cuts suddenly.]

SpongeBob: Oh, well, welcome to our home! The humble abode of Bikini Bottom.

[Cut to a panning shot around Bikini Bottom.]

SpongeBob: Isn't it beautiful? Now let's introduce ourselves. My name is SpongeBob--

[Text appears with a 'ding' sound effect, that reads: SPONGEBOB / "Sea" "Sponge" / AGE: 24 / OCCUPATION: Expert Optimist ]

SpongeBob: --and I can't move my arms.

[Cut to a panning shot of SpongeBob's arms.]

SpongeBob: Can't do it.

[Cut to a shot of SpongeBob staring out the window.]

SpongeBob: [voiceover] I love staring out the window, looking at the people outside.

[Closeup of SpongeBob.]

SpongeBob: Oh, there's a car! Oh, there's another car! And there's a guy dressed like an astronaut!

[Cut to SpongeBob walking over to Patrick, on the bed.]

SpongeBob: And this is Patrick!

[Text appears with a 'ding' sound effect, that reads: PATRICK / "Star" "Fish" / AGE: 25 / OCCUPATION: Retired Meditation Guru ]

SpongeBob: He loves laying in bed, and thinking Deep Psychological Thoughts.

''[Cut to a close-up of Patrick's face, with a psychedelic overlay. The Olivia Tremor Control's 'Dusk at Cubist Castle' can be heard in the background.]''

Patrick: [thinking] I wonder where I am...

''[Cut to SpongeBob walking over to Squidward, sitting at his computer. An ominous video plays, with music from 'Sideria' by Duster.]''

SpongeBob: And this is Squidward!

[Text appears with no sound effect, that reads: SQUIDWARD / "Actual" "Sea Creature" / AGE: ███ / OCCUPATION: ██████████████ ]

SpongeBob: He has a high interest in 'observing the arts'.

[A long pause.]

SpongeBob: Hey, Squidward!

[Squidward wakes up with a shriek.]

Squidward: [breathes heavily] SpongeBob!

SpongeBob: Yes, Squidward?

Squidward: Don't-- [grumbles unintelligibly]

[Squidward returns to his seat.]

SpongeBob: Yeah, Squidward can be kinda grouchy.

Squidward: I'm not grouchy!

SpongeBob: Sometimes even kinda angry.

Squidward: I'm not angry!

SpongeBob: But overall, he's pretty clever!

Squidward: I'm not clever- wait! No!

[SpongeBob giggles.]

SpongeBob: So yeah, I think that's pretty much all there is to--

Object 4-A: [offscreen] HEY.

''[A short pause. SpongeBob looks offscreen.]''

SpongeBob: ...What?

[Cut to Object 4-A, appearing on the floor.]

Object 4-A: ''WHAT ABOUT ME HUH. I'M IN THIS ROOM TOO.''

SpongeBob: But, well, I mean... you're not really from here, and, like... you're just gonna leave in five minutes like all the others, so...

Object 4-A: ''AW COME ON MAAAN. YOU GOTTA PICK ME.''

[SpongeBob turns to the camera.]

SpongeBob: [sighs] Just, just cut the scene, just--

Object 4-A: WAIT WAIT WAIT NO--

[Cut to ONE WEEK LATER. ''A short riff from Deerhoof's 'Twin Killers' introduces the scene, and Julia Holter's 'This Is a True Heart' plays in the background. The characters are once again sitting around doing nothing.]''

SpongeBob: [sighs] Patrick, I'm bored.

Patrick: Me too, SpongeBob.

SpongeBob: I wonder what we can do. [beat] Hey, Squidward!

[Cut to Squidward, sitting at his computer.]

Squidward: [sighs] What is it now, SpongeBob?

SpongeBob: Patrick and I are bored. Is there anything we can do?

[Squidward grumbles, and swivels his chair around to face them.]

Squidward: Come on, SpongeBob, there's plenty of things you can do! Just have a look around, you'll find something... and stop annoying me!

''[Squidward swivels his chair back. SpongeBob pauses, in thought.]''

SpongeBob: Squidward's right, Patrick, there is a lot of stuff to do here. I mean just look around! There's a lamp, there's a cupboard, there's this thing... I mean, there's a lot of stuff to do!

Patrick: Oh, SpongeBob, you forgot that!

[Patrick points off-screen.]

SpongeBob: Huh?