User blog:The Imperial Ghost/Everything Wrong with SpongeToons: Krusty Kriticism

[episode begins at the Krusty Krab; Mr. Krabs is hammering a nail into a metal wall with a slot in the middle; SpongeBob exits the double doors and walks over to Mr. Krabs]

'''Where is Mr.Krabs putting the complaints board? Up on the wooden roof? +1 sin'''

SpongeBob: What's going on, Mr. Krabs?

Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, say hello to the latest addition to our restaurant: [allows SpongeBob to see the metal wall with slot] The "Complaints Center".

SpongeBob: Complaints center? Last time you told a customer to go to the complaint's center, they went to the...

So they've had this before? So why is it a new thing if 1 customer went there before? +1 sin

Mr. Krabs: Yes, well...things are different now. Customers can complain all they please, without nagging me.

When in SpongeToons did a person go to Mr. Krabs and file a complaint? +1 sin

[camera pans out slowly; the camera is revealed to be reflecting of the lense of a telescope, in which Plankton is holding from the Chum Bucket]

Plankton: Complaints center, eh? Complaints? [grabs book] Here we are. The list of Bikini Bottom restaurant ordinances. [finger slides down until spot is reached] Eureka! [reads aloud] "All restaurants within Bikini Bottom borders must maintain the minimum amount of complaints allowed per week in order to stay open. If minimum quota is surpassed, the Bureau for Bikini Bottom Eateries will be forced to shut down said restaurant." Yes! This is it! This is how I'm going to put Krabs out of business! While he's sitting on the curb cold and feeble, I'll be keeping his secret formula nice and toasty.

Karen: [rides over to Plankton] What's your definition of toasty? You haven't paid the heating bill yet.

Plankton: In due time, Karen, I'll have enough dough to afford the heating bill and all of the stuff we want. All I need is some paper and my pen.

Karen: [scoffs] Your pen.

What is she laughing at? Is it a penis joke about a pen? +1 sin

Plankton: Run along, Karen. I've got complaints to write.

[scene cuts to Mr. Krabs, writing in his office]

Mr. Krabs: Ugh. Bills. [alarm suddenly blares] Huh?! Somebody must have left a complaint! [walks to outside] What's this? [takes out complaint from slot; reads aloud] "From anonymous: The bathrooms in the Krusty Krab are hideous. There is barely any toilet paper and the stalls are dirty at best."? Who wrote this?!

Squidward: [walks out] Quite obvious, sir. It's from anonymous.

'''Squidward is being Captain Obvious today. +1 sin'''

Mr. Krabs: Get back to work, Mr. Squidward! [Squidward walks back into Krusty Krab] Hmm. It could be anyone. But who?

[scene cuts to montage of the alarm blaring in Mr. Krabs's office, Plankton running from the slot after placing an anonymous complaint, and Mr. Krabs attempting to thwart anyone with a pencil or pen]

[the scene cuts to Squidward, SpongeBob, and Mr. Krabs, gathered around a table]

Mr. Krabs: What am I going to do? If I receive one more complaint, I'll have to shut down the Krusty Krab.

How many complaints are there now'''? 3? That's not enough to close a fast food place. +1 sin'''

Squidward: Can I send in a complaint?

Mr. Krabs: If I could fire you...

'''Mr. Krabs can't fire people? He did that with SpongeBob in the recent SpongeBob special very quickly. +1 sin'''

SpongeBob: Those complaints aren't just awful. They smell, too. Reminds me of the Chum Bucket.

Mr. Krabs: Chum Bucket, eh? [picks up one of the complaint notes; sniffs said note] It does smell like chum. I think we ought to pay Plankton a little visit.

[scene cuts to the Chum Bucket, where Mr. Krabs, Squidward, and SpongeBob are standing in front of the double doors]

Mr. Krabs: [knocks on door] Come on out, Plankton. We have a couple of questions for you!

Plankton: [walks out of double doors] What do you want, Krabs?

Mr. Krabs: Do you recognize these papers? [throws stack of complaints near Plankton]

Plankton: Never seen them before.

Mr. Krabs: Are you sure?

Plankton: Yes, Krabs.

Mr. Krabs: Are you really sure?

Plankton: I thought you said you only had a "couple" of questions to ask me.

SpongeBob: Admit it, Plankton.

Plankton: Admit what? SpongeBob: Admit...uh...Mr. Krabs, take this one.

'''Character starts to say something then just says something else cliche. +1 sin'''

Mr. Krabs: Admit that you're trying to undermine me business by exceeding me complaints quota.

Plankton: Sorry, but I've done no such thing.

Mr. Krabs: Then explain the smell of chum that's coming from all of these letters that you wrote.

Plankton: Smell of...Karen! I told you to bring me my pen! The chum pen is your pen!

Karen: [offscreen] Well, you should probably organize them!

'''Where is Karen? There's only 2 rooms in the Chum Bucket. +1 sin'''

Plankton: Fine, you've caught me, Krabs. I wrote all of those complaints. So?

Police Officer: [offscreen] So, you're going to jail. [walks up and handcuffs Plankton] Sheldon Plankton, you're in violation of ordinance 301 sub-section 13 of the Bikini Bottom restaurant ordinances.

Plankton: Sub-section 13?

Mr. Krabs: [pulls out book; puts on glasses] Which clearly states "...any restaurant owner that attempts sabotage of another restaurant through use of the complaint quota is to be arrested for weeks dictated by amount of complaints forged."

Plankton: Amount of weeks for complaints forged? [looks at large stack of complaints] Oh, dear.

'''Harkning back to my earlier question. How many complaints? 3? That's 3 weeks in prison. Worst punishment ever + 1 sin'''

Officer: Come along. [picks up Plankton and walks out of scene with him]

'''Plankton is small, so he could escape come back just then? +1 sin'''

[scene cuts to Mr. Krabs, SpongeBob, and Squidward, looking at the surplus amount of customers in the Krusty Krab dining room]

Mr. Krabs: Warms me heart to see that some mere complaints didn't stop me clintele from coming to the Krusty Krab. With that said, I've taken down the complaints compartment. Instead, I've stored it somewhere else from here on out.

SpongeBob: Where's that?

[scene cuts to the Krusty Krab bathroom, where a customer can be seen standing in a stall]

Customer: I don't think you understand my complaint. Are you even listening to me?

[a toilet flush is heard]

[episode ends]

Total sins - 9

Sentence - A drunken SuperFanon for a week.