Beyond

Transcript
(Round Two: Shitward and Sully vs Krabs and Shicowa; Keanu and Motlu vs Mindy and Triton)

Granite: For the second round of these fun space games, you guys will be going head to head in a rousing match of badminton. IN SPACE!

Mindy: That sounded very anticlimactic.

Sully: I agree.

Triton: Come on sis, let’s just destroy these noobs.

Keanu: Demigods versus badass humans. Nice.

Granite: Alright Shitward and the others, get your suits on and go out to the net.

Steve: Guys look I did something!

Granite: Way to go.

(Shitward and Sully are followed by Krabs and Shicowa into space for the match)

Shitward: Where are our rackets?

Steve: Here!

(Steve gives the duos rackets)

Jenkins: KICK THEIR ASSES SHICOWA!

Shitward: No!

(Krabs and Shicowa have already won)

Sully: Wait wh-

Steve: They started playing while you guys were communicating with Jenkins.

Granite: So Krabs and Shicowa now advance into the final round.

Krabs: Nice one Shicowa.

Shicowa: You know it. I was a badminton master back in my day.

Triton: A what?

Steve: Mindy and Triton, get out here. You’ll be taking on Keanu and Motlu.

Motlu: This is totally unfair, having demigods versus regular people and such.

Keanu: No you.

Motlu: Le gasp. Guys look, Keanu said something memeable.

Mindy: Isn’t everything he says memeable?

Keanu: Hello, I am Keanu.

Steve: Uh the match begins.

Shitward: Wait why are they told when they match begins.

Steve: Because I don’t like your face!

Granite: Steve! Silence!

Steve: Oh yeah, private thoughts.

(One intense badminton match later)

Granite: Mindy and Triton won, not much of a surprise there.

Granite: Shouldn’t we edit in the actual match?

Steve: It’s too much work. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to go disprove Newtonian Physics.

Granite: Alright.

(Final Round: Krabs and Shicowa vs Mindy and Triton)

Granite: Now it’s time for your final challenge. For your final challenge you’ll have a tag team race through space. Basically you’ll like swim out 100 meters and then swim back, tag your partner, and then whichever person gets to the 100 meter mark first wins.

Krabs: I’ll go first.

Triton: I’ll go first because I’m the superior swimmer.

Mindy: Space swimming?

Triton: Shut the hell up.

Granite: Go!

(Krabs swims out as fast as he can but it destroyed by Triton who loops back and tags Mindy before Krabs even reaches the 100 meter mark)

Krabs: Oh crap.

(Mindy swims out and wins)

Granite: Triton and Mindy win! Alright, let’s return to everybody else.

(Cut to the nomination ceremony)

Granite: Alright you two, nominate two duos to be up for elimination.

Mindy: Well first we nominate Keanu and Motlu because they seem like they’ll be popular fan favorites this season.

Motlu: Yeah I guess that’s fair.

Triton: Second we’re nominating Shitward and Sully because they’re both squids and the squids took over the sea in this alternative dimension father let me peer into.

Shitward: Oh, okay.

Granite: Well you heard it here first loyal viewers, go vote either Keanu and Motlu or Shitward and Sully to be up for elimination.

Who’s going home next? Keanu and Motlu Shitward and Sully