Independence Day (ADWSS Episode Transcript)

(camera appears to be flying around Bikini Bottom, while showing credits that say "An SBFW Production....", "Written By SuperFanon'D!", "Directed by IRmjii", when suddenly the camera hits SpongeBob's face, and the camera cuts to how it normally displays)

SpongeBob: Ow! What was that? Must be catching an illness..... a INDEPENDENCE DAY illness, that is! (jumps up to a stage, that suddenly appears, and begins to sing)

Independence Day, oh yeah! Fireworks exploding every which way! Oh yay! Independence Day, oh yeah, yeah, yeah-ah! Every year July the skies are exploding With liiiii-iiiiii-ights! Oh yeah, yeah, with liiiii-iiii-ights, oh yeah, yeah, yeah-ah! We're proud to say that the Pacific Ocean Is the most succesful sea of any kind! Oh yay, yay, yay-ay! Oh, yeah, it's Independence Day! So get out of your chairs Cuz' it's time to CELEBRATE! So get out your firewo-

Squidward: (yelling at SpongeBob out of his window) SpongeBob, would you please be quiet? I'm trying to absorb all the relaxation I can before all I can see is blinding lights and I can only hear explosions.

SpongeBob: (in the other window of Squidward's house) It's tonight, so you better soak up as much as possible.

Squidward: How did you get in my house? Oh, never mind. (pushes SpongeBob out his window) Now be sure not to bother me, or I'll never survive through tonight!

SpongeBob: Okay! (looks at watch) Oh no, I'm almost late for work! (rushes to the Krusty Krab)

(Scene: Krusty Krab)

SpongeBob: I'm here, Mr. Krabs! (checks in) Now to cook up some Krabby Patties...

Mr. Krabs: (blocks the door to the kitchen with his claw) No need, me boy. Today we aren't serving customers until night, where we're going to have an awesome Independence Day party! And it's your job to set up the party with me. I'm filling in for Squidward because he said he needed to (air quotes) "soak up joy before there's none left", whatever that means.

SpongeBob: Yipee! Well, let's start making a party with (holds out a book very close to the camera, and begins to speak in a musical voice) The Guide To Setting Up An Awesome Party! (stops using musical voice, and puts away the book)

Narrarator: Step One: The design!

SpongeBob: What do you think the trim for the party's color should be?

Mr. Krabs: White shoelaces!

Narrarator: Make sure the design isn't cheap so the people will enjoy it!

Mr. Krabs: White ribbon?

Narrarator: Think pricier!

Mr. Krabs: Cotton? Snow?

Narrarator: PRICIER!

Mr. Krabs: Neon? Is that pricy enough?

SpongeBob: Brilliant! That'll be the whole color theme for the party!

Mr. Krabs: And that'll be $10 less on your monthly paycheck.

Narrarator: Step Two: The Events!

Mr. Krabs: At the end, we're gonna have a FIRECRACKER blow up! Wooo!

Narrarator: Think bigger!

Mr. Krabs: A bigger firecracker?

SpongeBob: How about the biggest firework ever seen?!

Narrarator: Great idea, Mr. SquarePants!

Mr. Krabs: And you have to pay me $10 every week to keep your job now.

Narrarator: Now that you have all the essentials to the party, you need to get fish to actually be at the party, don't you! Step 3: The Advertisement!

Mr. Krabs: I was thinking of putting a flyer made of toilet paper on the pet store's wall saying "Party at the Krusty Krab tonight!"

SpongeBob: Or we could fly a blimp over Bikini Bottom that says "Independence Day party is at the Krusty Krab at 7:00 P.M.!"

Narrarator: Outstanding advertising, SpongeBob!

Mr. Krabs: You're going to give Squidward's paycheck with your money now, SpongeBob. And I get half of his paycheck.

SpongeBob: Now, let's put this into action!

Mr. Krabs: (puts neon beams around the tables and poles, that are glowing white)

SpongeBob: (on the phone) Yeah, I'd like to buy the Omega Huge Firework. (hears gibberish on phone, then raises eyes) Mr. Krabs, we'll need (whispers something in Mr. Krabs' ear that makes him horrified) dollars to pay for the firework.

Mr. Krabs: (hands SpongeBob some money) Consider that money a loan!

SpongeBob: (on phone again) Yes, I'd like a large blimp. (hears gibberish) Oh! Mr. Krabs, an extra $1,000, please.

Mr. Krabs: You're losing half of all your paychecks!

Delivery Man: Here's your stuff. (presses a button that lowers a blimp and a large firework on the ground) Let's not forget the shipping and handling fee.

Mr. Krabs: (hands the delivery man $500) You owe me loads of money, SpongeBob!

SpongeBob: Hide the firework and fly the blimp around downtown, Mr. Krabs. I'll go play with Patrick while you're doing that. (runs off to Conch Street)

(Scene: Patrick's Rock)

Patrick: Hi SpongeBob!

SpongeBob: Hi Patrick!

(long silence)

SpongeBob: I know what to do! A staring contest! One, two, three! (stares at Patrick)

Patrick: Nah.

SpongeBob: Blowing bubbles?

Patrick: Eh.

SpongeBob: A PARTY?

Patrick: OH YEAH!

(Scene: Krusty Krab)

SpongeBob: Patrick, the party starts in a minute!

Patrick: What lollipop?

SpongeBob: (confused) Um..... grape lollipop?

Patrick: Yum! (licks SpongeBob)

SpongeBob: I'm not a grape lollipop!

Patrick: Mmmm! (continues licking SpongeBob)

SpongeBob: Eww!

Patrick: Yum! That was delicious!

SpongeBob: The party's starting, Patrick!

Patrick: Will grape lollipops be served?

SpongeBob: No.

Patrick: WHY? WHY? WHY-hy-hy?

SpongeBob: I wonder where the fish are. (camera reveals nobody is there)

Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, Plankton trapped my customers! We've got to get them back, or else that's over a million dollars down the drain!

SpongeBob: Uh-oh!

Mr. Krabs: Here's the plan: you two sneak to the cage where the prisoners are trapped, while I "handle" Plankton.

(Scene: Chum Bucket)

SpongeBob: Patrick, I found the cage! But it's on the other side of the Chum Bucket, and the center is filled with lasers.

Patrick: Hmmmm..... (throws a metal bar at the power grid, which explodes the right of the Chum Bucket) Oops. (frees the prisoners by whacking the cage with the metal bar, which makes the gate go wide open)

SpongeBob: That was easy. Now let's open the kitchen door for Mr. Krabs so he can get to Plankton.

Patrick: (attempts to take a wire out of the power grid, but gets shocked)

SpongeBob: WATT are you doing?

Patrick: Trying to recover from the electricity.

SpongeBob: Oh my, that's quite SHOCKING! I'm glad I'm not in your CURRENT situation! I bet you can't wait to go.... (giggles) OHM!

Patrick: Enough with the corny electricity puns!

SpongeBob: Sorry, it's just im-VOLTS!

Patrick: DARN IT! (smacks power grid, which explodes the entire Chum Bucket)

SpongeBob: I guess that was quite a POWER-ful punch!

Patrick: Shut up!

Mr. Krabs: You two run the party, and I'll handle Plankton!

Plankton: So, Krabs, you thought you could get away with this? All of Bikini Bottom goes to your eatery, and even your parties! But this time, I get the customers, not you! I WILL DOMINATE THE KRUSTY KR-

Mr. Krabs: (steps on Plankton)

(Scene: Krusty Krab)

SpongeBob: What a great party!

Patrick: Yeah!

Fish: I'd like a Krabby Patty.

SpongeBob: (backflips into the kitchen, and quickly serves the fish a patty offscreen)

(the lights suddenly go off, making everyone confused)

Patrick: SpongeBob, the lighting's messed up.

SpongeBob: Don't you mean the LIGHTNING's messed up?

Patrick: Stop using those corny electric puns!

(a large breeze comes in the Krusty Krab)

Patrick: Could you make it warmer?

SpongeBob: All we need is some INSULATORS, but whatever. (heats the room and brings back the light) Mr. Krabs never pays the electric bill.

Patrick: That's it with those electric puns!

Mr. Krabs: Hi guys!

Plankton: Hi. Can we go now?

Mr. Krabs: Plankton, we need everyone at this party so I set a world record for most people at a party and get back the money I need for making this party! Now shoo!

Guiness World Record Approver: Okay, you set the worrld record. (hands Mr. Krabs lots of money)

Mr. Krabs: Now get outta here! (throws Plankton and the Guiness World Record Approver out of the Krusty Krab, into the remains of the Chum Bucket)

Karen: Oh, so now you have a friend that helps you win (coughs) fail at getting the Krabby Patty formula?

Plankton: Oh please, Karen. It's not-

Karen: It's not MY fault you fail! You're so lazy and you never think out your plans, and-

Plankton: (pulls a plug that de-activates Karen)

Mr. Krabs: It's time to explode the biggest firework ever!

(Mr. Krabs brings out a gigantic firework, and opens the Krusty Krab roof)

Mr. Krabs: Here we go! (activates the firework, which launches out red, yellow, and blue sparks, and eventually green, purple, and orange sparks, then a huge brown spark, then all of the sparks at once)

All: WOW!

(Scene: Squidward's House)

Squidward: Oh no. (puts on earplugs)

(Scene: Krusty Krab)

SpongeBob: Took a lot of ENERGY to make that firework, I assume!

Patrick: Oh, SHUT UP!

(the credits roll, and the episode ends)(camera appears to be flying around Bikini Bottom, while showing credits that say "An SBFW Production....", "Written By SuperFanon'D!", "Directed by IRmjii", when suddenly the camera hits SpongeBob's face, and the camera cuts to how it normally displays)

SpongeBob: Ow! What was that? Must be catching an illness..... a INDEPENDENCE DAY illness, that is! (jumps up to a stage, that suddenly appears, and begins to sing)

Independence Day, oh yeah! Fireworks exploding every which way! Oh yay! Independence Day, oh yeah, yeah, yeah-ah! Every year July the skies are exploding With liiiii-iiiiii-ights! Oh yeah, yeah, with liiiii-iiii-ights, oh yeah, yeah, yeah-ah! We're proud to say that the Pacific Ocean Is the most succesful sea of any kind! Oh yay, yay, yay-ay! Oh, yeah, it's Independence Day! So get out of your chairs Cuz' it's time to CELEBRATE! So get out your firewo-

Squidward: (yelling at SpongeBob out of his window) SpongeBob, would you please be quiet? I'm trying to absorb all the relaxation I can before all I can see is blinding lights and I can only hear explosions.

SpongeBob: (in the other window of Squidward's house) It's tonight, so you better soak up as much as possible.

Squidward: How did you get in my house? Oh, never mind. (pushes SpongeBob out his window) Now be sure not to bother me, or I'll never survive through tonight!

SpongeBob: Okay! (looks at watch) Oh no, I'm almost late for work! (rushes to the Krusty Krab)

(Scene: Krusty Krab)

SpongeBob: I'm here, Mr. Krabs! (checks in) Now to cook up some Krabby Patties...

Mr. Krabs: (blocks the door to the kitchen with his claw) No need, me boy. Today we aren't serving customers until night, where we're going to have an awesome Independence Day party! And it's your job to set up the party with me. I'm filling in for Squidward because he said he needed to (air quotes) "soak up joy before there's none left", whatever that means.

SpongeBob: Yipee! Well, let's start making a party with (holds out a book very close to the camera, and begins to speak in a musical voice) The Guide To Setting Up An Awesome Party! (stops using musical voice, and puts away the book)

Narrator: Step One: The design!

SpongeBob: What do you think the trim for the party's color should be?

Mr. Krabs: White shoelaces!

Narrator: Make sure the design isn't cheap so the people will enjoy it!

Mr. Krabs: White ribbon?

Narrator: Think pricier!

Mr. Krabs: Cotton? Snow?

Narrator: PRICIER!

Mr. Krabs: Neon? Is that pricy enough?

SpongeBob: Brilliant! That'll be the whole color theme for the party!

Mr. Krabs: And that'll be $10 less on your monthly paycheck.

Narrator: Step Two: The Events!

Mr. Krabs: At the end, we're gonna have a FIRECRACKER blow up! Wooo!

Narrator: Think bigger!

Mr. Krabs: A bigger firecracker?

SpongeBob: How about the biggest firework ever seen?!

Narrator: Great idea, Mr. SquarePants!

Mr. Krabs: And you have to pay me $10 every week to keep your job now.

Narrator: Now that you have all the essentials to the party, you need to get fish to actually be at the party, don't you! Step 3: The Advertisement!

Mr. Krabs: I was thinking of putting a flyer made of toilet paper on the pet store's wall saying "Party at the Krusty Krab tonight!"

SpongeBob: Or we could fly a blimp over Bikini Bottom that says "Independence Day party is at the Krusty Krab at 7:00 P.M.!"

Narrator: Outstanding advertising, SpongeBob!

Mr. Krabs: You're going to give Squidward's paycheck with your money now, SpongeBob. And I get half of his paycheck.

SpongeBob: Now, let's put this into action!

Mr. Krabs: (puts neon beams around the tables and poles, that are glowing white)

SpongeBob: (on the phone) Yeah, I'd like to buy the Omega Huge Firework. (hears gibberish on phone, then raises eyes) Mr. Krabs, we'll need (whispers something in Mr. Krabs' ear that makes him horrified) dollars to pay for the firework.

Mr. Krabs: (hands SpongeBob some money) Consider that money a loan!

SpongeBob: (on phone again) Yes, I'd like a large blimp. (hears gibberish) Oh! Mr. Krabs, an extra $1,000, please.

Mr. Krabs: You're losing half of all your paychecks!

Delivery Man: Here's your stuff. (presses a button that lowers a blimp and a large firework on the ground) Let's not forget the shipping and handling fee.

Mr. Krabs: (hands the delivery man $500) You owe me loads of money, SpongeBob!

SpongeBob: Hide the firework and fly the blimp around downtown, Mr. Krabs. I'll go play with Patrick while you're doing that. (runs off to Conch Street)

(Scene: Patrick's Rock)

Patrick: Hi SpongeBob!

SpongeBob: Hi Patrick!

(long silence)

SpongeBob: I know what to do! A staring contest! One, two, three! (stares at Patrick)

Patrick: Nah.

SpongeBob: Blowing bubbles?

Patrick: Eh.

SpongeBob: A PARTY?

Patrick: OH YEAH!

(Scene: Krusty Krab)

SpongeBob: Patrick, the party starts in a minute!

Patrick: What lollipop?

SpongeBob: (confused) Um..... grape lollipop?

Patrick: Yum! (licks SpongeBob)

SpongeBob: I'm not a grape lollipop!

Patrick: Mmmm! (continues licking SpongeBob)

SpongeBob: Eww!

Patrick: Yum! That was delicious!

SpongeBob: The party's starting, Patrick!

Patrick: Will grape lollipops be served?

SpongeBob: No.

Patrick: WHY? WHY? WHY-hy-hy?

SpongeBob: I wonder where the fish are. (camera reveals nobody is there)

Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, Plankton trapped my customers! We've got to get them back, or else that's over a million dollars down the drain!

SpongeBob: Uh-oh!

Mr. Krabs: Here's the plan: you two sneak to the cage where the prisoners are trapped, while I "handle" Plankton.

(Scene: Chum Bucket)

SpongeBob: Patrick, I found the cage! But it's on the other side of the Chum Bucket, and the center is filled with lasers.

Patrick: Hmmmm..... (throws a metal bar at the power grid, which explodes the right of the Chum Bucket) Oops. (frees the prisoners by whacking the cage with the metal bar, which makes the gate go wide open)

SpongeBob: That was easy. Now let's open the kitchen door for Mr. Krabs so he can get to Plankton.

Patrick: (attempts to take a wire out of the power grid, but gets shocked)

SpongeBob: WATT are you doing?

Patrick: Trying to recover from the electricity.

SpongeBob: Oh my, that's quite SHOCKING! I'm glad I'm not in your CURRENT situation! I bet you can't wait to go.... (giggles) OHM!

Patrick: Enough with the corny electricity puns!

SpongeBob: Sorry, it's just im-VOLTS!

Patrick: DARN IT! (smacks power grid, which explodes the entire Chum Bucket)

SpongeBob: I guess that was quite a POWER-ful punch!

Patrick: Shut up!

Mr. Krabs: You two run the party, and I'll handle Plankton!

Plankton: So, Krabs, you thought you could get away with this? All of Bikini Bottom goes to your eatery, and even your parties! But this time, I get the customers, not you! I WILL DOMINATE THE KRUSTY KR-

Mr. Krabs: (steps on Plankton)

(Scene: Krusty Krab)

SpongeBob: What a great party!

Patrick: Yeah!

Fish: I'd like a Krabby Patty.

SpongeBob: (backflips into the kitchen, and quickly serves the fish a patty off-screen)

(the lights suddenly go off, making everyone confused)

Patrick: SpongeBob, the lighting's messed up.

SpongeBob: Don't you mean the LIGHTNING's messed up?

Patrick: Stop using those corny electric puns!

(a large breeze comes in the Krusty Krab)

Patrick: Could you make it warmer?

SpongeBob: All we need is some INSULATORS, but whatever. (heats the room and brings back the light) Mr. Krabs never pays the electric bill.

Patrick: That's it with those electric puns!

Mr. Krabs: Hi guys!

Plankton: Hi. Can we go now?

Mr. Krabs: Plankton, we need everyone at this party so I set a world record for most people at a party and get back the money I need for making this party! Now shoo!

Guiness World Record Approver: Okay, you set the worrld record. (hands Mr. Krabs lots of money)

Mr. Krabs: Now get outta here! (throws Plankton and the Guiness World Record Approver out of the Krusty Krab, into the remains of the Chum Bucket)

Karen: Oh, so now you have a friend that helps you win (coughs) fail at getting the Krabby Patty formula?

Plankton: Oh please, Karen. It's not-

Karen: It's not MY fault you fail! You're so lazy and you never think out your plans, and-

Plankton: (pulls a plug that de-activates Karen)

Mr. Krabs: It's time to explode the biggest firework ever!

(Mr. Krabs brings out a gigantic firework, and opens the Krusty Krab roof)

Mr. Krabs: Here we go! (activates the firework, which launches out red, yellow, and blue sparks, and eventually green, purple, and orange sparks, then a huge brown spark, then all of the sparks at once)

All: WOW!

(Scene: Squidward's House)

Squidward: Oh no. (puts on earplugs)

(Scene: Krusty Krab)

SpongeBob: Took a lot of ENERGY to make that firework, I assume!

Patrick: Oh, SHUT UP!

(the credits roll, and the episode ends)