Battle of the Business Owners

 is the pilot episode of the series, Bracket Battles, and the first episode of season one. This match-up features the two capitalists of Bikini Bottom going head-to-antennae. It is Mr. Krabs versus Plankton live from the Codman's Bureau Arena.

Characters

 * Ring announcer
 * Referee
 * Mr. Krabs
 * Plankton
 * Commentator (cameo)

Transcript

 * [episode begins at the Codman's Bureau Arena; boats are filling up the parking lots and loads of fish are entering the arena; bright lights are shining from the roof and in the front; the camera cuts to a ring, where a suited male fish is standing in the center; the arena's seats are filled]


 * Ring announcer: [microphone lowers] Ladies and gentlemen, it's our main event! Tonight, we have the red versus the green. In this corner, [points to Mr. Krabs] we have the inventor of the Krabby Patty, the Red Robber Baron, weighing in at 5000 clam bills...Eugene H. Krabs!


 * Mr. Krabs: [holds up a money flag] I'm gonna win this for money!


 * Ring announcer: [points to Plankton] And standing in the...near opposite corner...


 * Plankton: Huh? [looks at feet; positions slightly to the right]


 * Ring announcer: The inventor of chum, the Less Successful of the Two...


 * Plankton: Hey!


 * Ring announcer: Weighing in at a speck of dust, Sheldon J. Plankton!


 * Plankton: I'll do this for the Chum Bucket! [crowd boos] Then I'll do it so that I can annihilate all of you! [crowd silences]


 * Referee: [enters ring] I want a clean fight, gentlemen. Pick up after yourselves. [rings bell]


 * [Mr. Krabs circles Plankton, as Plankton does Mr. Krabs]


 * Mr. Krabs: You can't win, Plankton. I'll always be head-and-shoulders taller. Also, torso. And legs and feet.


 * Plankton: That may be true, Krabs, [stops circling] so I brought a little something something to take care of that. [takes out remote and presses button; a robotic suit suddenly unfolds from a belt on Plankton's waist; the robot unfolds until Plankton stands a few feet taller than Mr. Krabs] How's the playing field now, Krabs?!


 * Mr. Krabs: [gulps] Not good.


 * [Plankton grabs Mr. Krabs, stretches him, and uses him as a jump rope; he throws Mr. Krabs into the ropes, catches him, and splashes onto him]


 * Plankton: You can't win, Krabs!


 * Mr. Krabs: Oh, can't I? [grabs money from pocket and throws it at Plankton's face]


 * Plankton: [looks away] What the?


 * Mr. Krabs: Taste fists! [jumps at Plankton with two fist held up; the screen flashes and returns with Plankton, sitting with stars around his head] Ha!


 * Plankton: [shakes head] That's it! It's time for the finisher! [grabs Mr. Krabs in a bearhug; the robot jumps into the air and spins wildly; he begins falling toward the mat while spinning]


 * Commentator 1: [revealed behind a table with headset] Plankton, now going for his finishing move: The Formula Stealer!


 * Mr. Krabs: I don't think so! [slips out of bearhug; grabs onto ring announcer's microphone]


 * Plankton: Huh?! [crashes to ground; the robot smashes to pieces]


 * Mr. Krabs: [grabs Plankton] Time for me finisher! [throws Plankton onto rope; runs to opposite ropes; jumps and splashes onto Plankton to the mat]


 * [Plankton is shown on the mat, stars around his head again]


 * Ring announcer: [enters ring; holds up Mr. Krabs's hand] The winner of this match: Mr. Eugene Krabs!


 * [Mr. Krabs begins throwing money into the crowd]


 * Mr. Krabs: Wait a minute, you freeloaders! Give that back!


 * Ring announcer: Mr. Krabs, you have just won your match. What are you going to do now?


 * Mr. Krabs: I'm going to become the "Bracket Battles" Champion!


 * Commentator: Mr. Krabs will now face the winner of our next match, next week at the Municipal Bottom Arena.


 * [episode ends with Mr. Krabs, celebrating his victory]

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