User blog:Cosmobo/plankman!

◾[View of the Krusty Pingas] ◾Squidward: [from inside] One Nasty Patty for table nine thousand!. Spingebill, I don't have the whole day. [cut to inside in the kitchen] ◾SpongeBob: Oui, oui.uui oui oui 9000! Krabby Patty, Monsieur. First, les Pingas. [ blast it into the air with shoop da whoop it falls into one of his holes. He holds up the other ingredients] ◾Squidward: Come on, Luigi ◾SpongeBob: Next, les ingredients. [throws them in the air] Ah, oui! [he catches them in his holes and his pants] Les mustard. [he squirts some out and it lands in his eye] ◾Squidward: Les quit fooling around, where's my Krabby Patty? ◾SpongeBob: Les hold on a second! [SpongeBob takes his head and shakes it all up. When he puts it back on his body, his eyes roll around] And voila! [he goes up to Squidward and pulls a Krabby Patty from under his nose] It's under your conk! [laughs and puts it on a plate. Squid pretends to laugh] ◾Squidward: You're killing me SpongeBob! Ha ha ha… you really are.[shows a grave saying squidward he killed him he really did] [close up on the patty]. ◾SpongeBob: Look at it, Squidward. Mr. pingas' gift to all of Bikini Bombs -- the Nasty Patty.. ◾Squidward: Okay, give it to me. [the Krabby Patty flies off of the plate and starts bouncing all over the place] WTF?![squidward blows up] ◾SpongeBob: [the patty slithers out the door and heads for the exit] I swear I'm not doing anything. Mr. Pingas! The Nasty Patty is haunted! [the patty gallops along until Mr. pingas spears it with his leg. A tiny thing comes out from it and Krabs inspects it in a magnifying glass] ◾Mr. pingas: Avast, ye patty pirate! [you are a pirate is heard] This is no bowser its a trap!. This is… [view of in the magnifying glass, of a tiny jelly bean-shaped green creature with one eye] Plankton! Stealing me booty! [freezes and look at that booty starts to play] ◾Plankton: [first lines] Hear me pingas. When I discover your formula for Nasty Patties, I'll run you out of business. I went to college! [Krabs picks up the puny pest] Hey! Let me go! ◾Mr. Krabs: Oh I'll let you go, squirt. On a flying saucer! [the x files theme plays and it shows a flying saucer flying through the sky] [laughs. He splats Plankton on a plate and spins him back across the street, to the Chum Bucket] Back to the Chum Bucket with you! ◾Plankton: You'll pay for this pingas! [slams through the doors] ◾SpongeBob: Uh.. Plankton, sir? ◾Mr. Krabs: Aye, he's been trying to steal me booty for years. But you haven't got it yet, have ye bug? [laughs.. SpongeBob joins in, braying with laughter. pingas stops but Sponge keeps laughing] OK. [keeps laughing] Enough lad, it wasn't that funny. [keeps laughing] Get back to work! [Sponge stops. Cut to nighttime at the Krusty Krab] ◾SpongeBob: [from inside] OK Mr. pingas, see you tomorrow! ◾Mr. Krabs: Good night, me boy! [Sponge walks out and walks past the Chum Bucket contently] ◾Plankton: [unseen] Psst… young man Im talking to you missy!. [Sponge looks around to see where this voice came from] Yes, over here. Come on boy, a little closer. [Sponge walks forward] Closer… [Sponge walks] Not that close! [a crunching sound is heard. Sponge lifts up his shoe revealing a squished Plankton] You blasted barnacle head! I mean… whats up?. [Sponge peels Plankton off his shoe and onto his hand] ◾SpongeBob: Plankton? What do you want? ◾Plankton: I just want to talk. You could say we're friends, right? ◾SpongeBob: Um...no. ◾Plankton: Acquaintances? ◾SpongeBob: No. ◾Plankton: Well, we're both invertebrates, aren't we? ◾SpongeBob: I...guess so. ◾Plankton: You see? Everything works out. I have something for you. I've been keeping it in my secret compartment. [rummages through his back pocket and takes out a golden spatula] Ding! [in unison with the sparkling of the spatula] Sparkle, sparkle. ◾SpongeBob: Wow! A golden spatula! And its even got my name on it. ◾Plankton: It's a gift! A gift from a friend. [shows the scene saying its a trap][hugs Sponge's thumb] Friends give each other gifts. And tomorrow is my birthday. [puts a birthday hat on his head and Sponge's thumb and then blows a noisemaker. He then takes out a cake] And you know what I'd like more than anything in the whole wide world? [blows out the candles]. ◾SpongeBob: A booster seat? [Plankton takes off the hat]. ◾Plankton: Booster seat? Hot dog! I mean, no. What I want for my birthday from you my friend, is one of those [starts to drool] tender… delicious… Nasty Patties! [Sponge drops Plankton and screams] ◾SpongeBob: You just want to be friends so you can get your hands on a Nasty Patty! And I bet it's not even your birthday tomorrow. ◾Plankton: Gee, and I thought you were stupid. ◾SpongeBob: You'll never get a Nasty Patty from me! [walks off, then stops] Even if we are friends! [runs off] Never, never, never, never! ◾Plankton: Oh, I'll get a Krabby Patty and you're going to hand-deliver it to me personally! You weak-minded fool! [takes out a gramophone that plays evil music and laughs evilly to it. Cut to Sponge going to sleep] ◾SpongeBob: Good night Larry. [larry meows. Sponge goes to sleep. Just then, one of the flowers on Sponge's bed pattern pops up. It's Plankton in disguise, wearing a backpack, that looks more like an antenna-like machine] ◾Plankton: [chuckling] SpongeBob, you will be mine! [pulls out the record player and laughs evilly to it. But it actually plays a kid's song of the A-B-C's. ◾Woman: Letters of the alphabet, A-B-C... D F [beeping] G![Beeping]G!BITCH!!!!! ◾[Plankton realizes this and flips the record around. It plays the evil music like last time and he laughs. Then he walks through one of Sponge's holes and begins his journey. Plankton reads a map that looks like a regular road map, except with a giant brain in the middle of it] ◾Plankton: It should be in here… but where? [pan out to reveal he's standing on the brain] Where? Oh… [takes off the antenna thing on his back] This will be the beginning of the end! [outside, Sponge rolls to his left in his sleep. The brain falls to the right inside and Plankton falls off] Ouch! Stupid brain… [gives chase] Come back here you swine! [Sponge then rolls to his right. Inside, the brain squishes Plankton. Sponge then sleeps on his back and the brain stops rolling. Plankton holds up a roll of duct tape] That's it brain, you're going down! [Plankton uses tape to hold it down] Yes, yes, that's grand. [takes out blueprints] And now, for my very elaborate and college-educated plan. [the blueprints reveal a picture of the antenna thing labeled "Control" and an arrow pointing to a picture of a brain labeled "Brain." Plankton follows these instructions by jamming the control in the brain] And now it's time for a little wakey-uppy. [his hands on the control levers, he uses his foot to press the "Total Control" button. Outside, Sponge wakes up] ◾SpongeBob: Morning already? [Plankton jams the controls causing Sponge's legs to jam out to his side. He rumbles and falls down. Plankton laughs evilly] I… I feel a little funny today. [using the controls, he makes Sponge walk. Plankton laughs] ◾Plankton: I have you now! [outside, Sponge keeps walking toward the kitchen] ◾SpongeBob: Time for a well-balanced diner me boy. [he rams through the wall and through the fridge emerging with bread, a bottle of milk and an egg carton on his head] This isn't what I had in mind. [he walks toward the straps with his pants attached] Let me just grab my pants. [he walks toward them and they spring him. He eventually gives free and keeps walking] I guess I'm not wearing any pants today.Im going to burn down the krusty krab! [he crashes through the side of the wall] I guess I'm not using the door either. See you later larry! … I guess. [Gary meows] You're right, larry! There is something wrong with me! Squidward! Squidward! Wake up! I need some help! [inside Squid's house, he tries to sleep. Off-screen] Squidward! Help! ◾Squidward: Be quiet, mama luigi! [Sponge bursts through the wall of Squid's room] ◾SpongeBob: Heeelllp! ◾Squidward: WTF?! I'm talking to you! SpongeBob! SpongeBob, are you mad? [Sponge crashes through the opposite wall. He stops walking and his head turns around 180 degrees] ◾Plankton: [through SpongeBob] Shut your mouth, you mediocre saxophone player. ◾Squidward: Mediocre? [from inside, Plankton speaks through a microphone] ◾Plankton: You pretentious little insignificant artist. Your snivelly creations are worth less than a protozoan's waste! [Sponge snaps out of it] ◾SpongeBob: Something must be wrong with my brain! [Sponge's eyes roll into the back of his head and he sees Plankton. Gasps] Plankton! What kind of friend are you? ◾Plankton: Nonsense. You never liked me anyway. You wouldn't even come to my birthday party! [from outside…] ◾SpongeBob: Get out of my head! Leave my brain alone! [in Plankton's voice] Never! Never! [laughs and walks out backward. Squid faints. Sponge crashes through Patrick's rock and reemerges with Pat on his head. Sponge throws him off and he's pinned into the ground. Sponge walks toward the Krusty Krab] ◾Plankton: [inside Sponge] Toot toot! How about a little take-out? ◾SpongeBob: No, never! [he crashes through it, reemerging with a Krabby Patty. Plankton laughs evilly] You can't fool me Plankton, you want the Nasty Patty secret formula! [Sponge walks into the Chum Bucket] ◾Plankton: You are going to hand it over to me personally! ◾SpongeBob: No, no, no! [they're inside and walk through a door] There's no one here..

Plankton:yes!yes!yes!

◾Plankton: Don't remind me. Brace yourself SpongeBob, this is my lab! [the room he's walked into has a screen with a live-action Labrador retriever. He barks a couple of times. They walk into the next room, a real lab] And this is my laboratory! And did I ever show you my record player? [he pulls it out again and it plays dramatic music. Plankton laughs] ◾SpongeBob: I must fight!

[scene goes to a fight on mortal kombat]

[finish him!]

[plankton rips of spongebobs head]

Plankton:I win!you lose!

SpongeBob:plankton cheated!

[he mumbles nonsensically and stretches his head out and bites against the side of the door. His body keeps trying to walk] ◾Plankton: No, no, no, no. [he pushes the levers forward with causes Sponge to lose grip and slam against the wall and wobble over to a giant funnel thing] There, you see how much easier it is when you help, friend? How do you like my analyzer? It tells the ingredients of whatever I put into it. [a robot arm clenching some seaweed comes in and drops it in the giant funnel analyzer. It's zapped and some beeping is heard from the giant computer screen. The screen then reads what the computer says] ◾Computer: Seaweed: 50% Sea, 50% Weed. [a picture of the seaweed appears] ◾Plankton: Impressed? Now let's reveal that secret formula. [laughs. pulls the lever forward, letting two of Sponge's fingers off the patty. He's holding it with both hands, so one finger from each hand] And this little piggy brought home a Krabby Patty. [two more fingers loose grip] This little piggy will help me drop it in. Any last words, SpongeBob SecretPants? [Sponge tries to resist, but stops] ◾SpongeBob: I just have to say I'm sorry I let Mr. Krabs down. [tears fill his eyes and leak down his face] I let all of Bikini Bottom down. But worst of all, I let you down, you delicate little Krabby Patty. ◾Plankton: Mmm…donuts ◾SpongeBob: [tearing up even more] With your tasty, juicy, scrumptious, warm, steamy Kentucky fried goodness.Its finger licking good! [inside, Plankton starts to get hungry] ◾Plankton: Steamy… [a live-action patty gets assembled on screen as Sponge states the ingredients] ◾SpongeBob: I'll never forget your 100% all-secret bootys, secretly assembled with undersea cheese,

[shows mr krabs saying no cheese from the first film]

pickles, lettuce, tomato, onion, all secretly steamed between two fluffy seaweed-sea buns. [inside, Plankton starts to drool excessively] ◾Plankton: Yes… yes… YES!! [he jumps out of one of Sponge's holes to the patty] Come to poppa! [he bounces off the patty and lands in the analyzer] Oh boy… [he's zapped and the computer reads out the analysis] ◾Computer: Plankton: 1% evil, 99% hot gas. [Plankton appears on screen] ◾Plankton: Well, this stinks. ◾SpongeBob: Well patty, I guess we can go home now. [walks out] ◾Plankton: SpongeBob, that's my Nasty Patty! [Sponge walks out the swivel doors and they go back and forth] Give it back, you porous freak! I command you! My patty! [the doors come to a close] Nooooo! I'll settle for some fries.

[shows plankton out of the chum bucket]

Planktom:Im going to take over the world!

[shows a giant poop come down on plankton]

Plankton:what the barnacles?!

SpongeBob:if you liked the poop you just watched then why not watch others?

Plankton:let me out of here!

SpongeBob:well bye then see ya later everyone!