Police squid

For sok

Trans
(Ep starts with Squidward practicing his clarinet)

Squidward: (stops playing) ugh, sour note!

Patrick: (from outside) hey squidward, you suck ass at playing the clarinet!

(Cut to squidward looking out the window)

Squidward: Who taught you that word?!

Patrick: (offscreen) some guy told me it while i ate their food.

(Squidward goes back inside. Cut to squidward back inside)

Squidward: I HATE MY LI- (snaps clarinet in half) uh…

(He throws the clarinet out the window)

Squidward: could this day get any worse?

(A slight breeze blows Squidward out the window)

(Cuts to squidward falling and landing on the ground. Afterwards it cuts to Squidward on the ground)

Squidward: of course.

(Squidward stands up as a flyer goes on his face)

Squidward: AH! (Removes flyer) uh? (Reading flyer) Help wanted at the police station. (No longer reading it and puts his hands in the air) hooray for convenience!

(Cuts to squidward in an interview room)

Cop: alright, (reads paper) squidword. (No longer reading) why do you think you'd fit the job?

Squidward: i uhh… Am hard working!

Cop: good, good. And?

Squidward: i uh, would never slack off.

Cop: nice, continue.

Squidward: i, uh, have never broken any laws at all. No need to check criminal records and no i did not kill that person!

Cop: goo- WHAT?!

Squidward: UM, my… nose is a penis?

Cop: (squints for 4 seconds) you're hired!

Squidward: woo!

(Cuts back to the front yard of sb’s house)

Spongebob: i wonder where squidward went?

Patrick: probably to clarinet practices.

(Multiple fish appear behind him)

Fish: (all at once) OOOOH!

(the fish disappear)

Spongebob: wait, wha-

Squidward: (offscreen) hey Spongebob and patrick!

Spongebob: what the-

(Slow-mo shot of Squidward drives by while “fuck the police” plays and Squidward is flipping spongebob and Patrick off while varying from shots to squidward, Spongebob and Patrick. Lasts for 8 seconds.)

Spongebob: what just happened?

Patrick: i dunno, something about police being fucked

(Squidward goes into the krust krab)

Krabs: oh hi Squidward!

(Squidward tasers mr krabs)

Squidward: take that dipshit!

Mr krabs: what was that for?

Squidward: i just hate you. (Shoots mr krabs twice and runs out the door)

Cuts to the police station

Police: Squidward, you are by far the worst cop ever.

Squidward: what?! No im not!

Police: you shot a homeless guy.

Squidward: he was trying to rob me!

(He gets thrown out)