The Life Of Living Patrick!

Patrick's New Life is a currently ongoing/active spin-off of SpongeBob SquarePants by LKAD. After being taunted and laughed at Squidward, Patrick decides that he is indeed an idiot and decides to leave Bikini Bottom forever for Starville, where he meet new friends, acquaintances, villains and others as he starts a new life. EVERY SEASON CONSISTS OF 20 EPISODES. Anyone, even IPs, can edit this as long as there's nothing wrong with the episodes!

This show airs everyday at 9-10 AM and 6-9 PM on Nick at Nite (nick@nite). There, it receives a TV-PG rating.

Nickelodeon had originally planned to cancel the show after Season 3, but continuing popularity and strong merchandise sales eventually convinced Nickelodeon to let the show continue.

Summary
Patrick leaves Bikini Bottom after being laughed at by Squidward and eventually stumbles upon Starville, which eventually hosts Patrick's new home. He meets some new friends and acquaintances, such as Mayor Alastair MacFish. Unfortunately, Tattletale Strangler is Vice-Mayor and wants to remove Patrick as a first step towards revenge at SpongeBob (who pays a visit occasionally with other friends).

In Season 2, Squidward moves to Starville just to attend class by the legendary James Clarinetstar. His nemesis Squilliam moves there too and buys a nearby copper mine. The continuation of their rivalry is a sub-plot in this show, which mainly takes place in or around the mostly starfish-inhabited Starville.

Characters
See List of characters in Patrick's New Life.

Episodes
See also List of episodes in Patrick's New Life for easier navigation.

Season 1
1. Goodbye Bikini Bottom, Hello Starville: After being taunted and laughed at by Squidward for doing numerous foolish things, Patrick leaves Bikini Bottom, against the wishes of his friends (except Squidward), for Starville, where he buys a house sold for free next to the House of the Mayor and gets to meet Mayor Alastair MacFish and Vice-Mayor Tattletale Strangler when they visited Patrick, who still wants revenge at Patrick's best friend SpongeBob (see the SBSP Season 3 episode SpongeBob Meets the Strangler on how the Strangler meets SpongeBob) and seeks to remove Patrick as soon as possible.

First appearance: Patrick Star, Alastair MacStar, Tattletale Strangler, SpongeBob SquarePants, Squidward Tentacles, Sandy Cheeks, Patty Rechid, Ty Cobbstar, Jack Beanstar.

2. No More, Clarinet-a-James: SpongeBob, Sandy and Squidward (reluctantly) pay a visit to Patrick in Starville. Patrick brings them to the Clarinet Palace to attend lessons from national clarinetist celebrity (and Squidward's idol) James "Clarinet-a-James" Clarinetstar. Squidward's horrible playing causes disaster, and Clarinetstar gives Squidward a week to improve his clarinet playing, otherwise he'll leave Starville and force the Clarinet Palace into bankruptcy.

First appearance: James "Clarinet-a-James" Clarinetstar, Selma Clarinetstar, Quentin Tay, Anna Tay, Ollie Ettimoore, Chris Doneganstar, P. E. P. S. I. Hooray.

3. Community Patrick: Patrick is forced to do community service for 47 hours, 59 minutes and 59 seconds after littering in front of Jay Giftstar's gift shop, the Starville Gift Shop, but he only adds more littering. Mayor MacStar and Vice-Mayor Strangler get into a televised (Patrick's idea) debate on what to do with Patrick, with Strangler suggesting that Patrick be executed and MacStar sending Patrick to a mental institution. The debate is inconclusive.

First appearance: Judge Pietro MacStar, Jay Giftstar, Mary-Sue Giftstar.

4. Patrick-o-Advertise: Jay and Mary-Sue Giftstar hire Patrick as the cashier in their Starville Gift Shop. Patrick messes up with his job, but instead of firing him, Jay exploits Patrick as a tool for television advertising. "Mr. Gift Hero" becomes suddenly popular and, aside from appearing in commercials, Patrick is trusted to give gifts to customers after Jay deals with the payment.

5. President the Stupid: A series of mistakes in procedures result in Patrick, instead of Mayor Alastair MacFish, being nominated for President of the United Cities of Bottom. With the other candidates withdrawing in protest of an idiot being nominated, Patrick is automatically elected President and started making policies which are either foolish or totalitarian in nature, so former President Joshua Swad instigates a national revolution to return to power.

First appearance: Joshua Swad.

6. Me, The Judge and The Clarinetist: Patrick and his new friend, none other than Judge Pietro MacStar, attend a James Clarinetstar lesson in the Clarinet Palace, only to be told, along with all other students, that Clarinetstar is planning for a clarinet show on the stage. Patrick and the others train rigorously in preparation for the show.

7. Stop the Debate: The citizens of Starville travel to "human land" with Sandy Cheeks as the guide. Traveling to San Francisco, Patrick mistakes the dynamites for bottles and mislead the other Starvillians into believing him. Finding that the bottles cannot be used, Patrick and the Starvillians throw it to the Golden Gate Bridge, blowing up parts of it. As Patrick faces life imprisonment, Sandy tries to negotiate with city authorities to ensure Patrick's release.

8. No Smoking is Star: Patrick and the gate guards Ty Cobbstar and Jack Beanstar appear in an anti-smoking commercial. Patrick mistakes a lit cigarette in the commercial for a drinking straw and takes it right before the camera. Patrick soon finds himself becoming a star as a result of the commercial while smoking every single day. He realizes that he hates being a star and tries to stop smoking and put the commercial out of broadcast.

9. The Starville Bowl: Cobbstar and Beanstar volunteer to join the underachieving Starville Rockets in the Starville Bowl against the Starville Jets. In a major upset, the Rockets win and football teams from neighboring cities try to take Cobbstar and Beanstar. When Mayor MacStar refuses to let them leave Starville, representatives from other cities come to fight against each other, including against Starville's representative with the winner to take the two.

Note: First episode not to feature Patrick as the main character.

10. Patrick the Journalist: Part 1 (A History of Glory): Patrick poses as a journalist and asks some of the more older men in Starville of their involvement in the Bikini Bottom Naval Mutiny of 1969.

First appearance: Mr. Krabs (flashback), the Bikini Bottom Naval Mutineers of 1969.

11. Patrick the Journalist: Part 2 (Alastair on the Fast Lane): Patrick asks Mayor Alastair MacFish of his years as an underwater champion racer and why he shouted "Holyfield madman!" while attending the second Holyfield-Tyson fight in June 1997 (for which Alastair made the Sports Illustrated cover in July) despite the fact "that in that fight, Tyson was the true madman".

12. Patrick the Journalist: Part 3 (The Magnate's Daughter): Patrick asks fellow James Clarinetstar class student Ollie Ettiemoore on why she ran away from home and the unimaginative strict, business-like life under his father, business magnate Albert Ettiemoore.

First appearance: Albert Ettiemoore (flashback).

13. Read My Lips: More and More Taxes: After an economic downturn, Mayor Alastair announces that he is raising existing taxes and creating new ones. The public enraged, Patrick steps in to find a solution to the downturn "with my stupidity" and eliminate the necessity of raising and creating new taxes.

14. The Sea Dragon's Curse: Having been rude to Uno the Sea Dragon (whom he views as a "stinky monster") Patrick is given credit for motivating Uno to place a 1000-year curse on the gift shop. Patrick, Jay and Mary-Sue go to Uno's lair and have to complete several puzzles to lift the curse. Eventually, Uno becomes the new cashier, while Patrick (much to his happiness) becomes a janitor as the lair is bulldozed for a real estate project.

First appearance: Uno the Sea Dragon.

15. The Starville Gift Shop Training Video: A training video for the Starville Gift Shop directed by Jay and Mary-Sue, starring Patrick, Mayor Alastair and Vice-Mayor Strangler, who uses the opportunity to try remove Patrick from the scene.

16. Coin Scare: Part 1: After homeless Sano Torino enters a coma after touching a coin on the street, a "coin scare" ensues in Starville as people avoid using coins. Patrick finds out that the coin Torino discovers is actually intended to kill Patrick (whose house is right in front of the place Torino finds the coin) but somehow misses the target. However, instead of securing the arrest of Tattletale Strangler, Patrick accuses "bad environment" for "poisoning" the coin, rendering the results ineffective.

First appearance: Sano Torino.

17. Coin Scare: Part 2: Uno is unconvinced of Patrick's investigation and launches his own investigation, concluding that Strangler is indeed behind the coin. He and Patrick go to the Starville Hospital where Torino regains consciousness and reports seeing a mailman dropping the coin. Asking mailmen in Starville, Uno and Patrick instead comes to a conclusion that the coin has been accidentally exposed to dangerous chemicals, and the investigation is closed without any clear result.

First appearance: Jack the Mailman, The Mailmen Association of Starville.

18. The Strange Story of an Encyclopaedia: The Starville government commissions an encyclopedia, titled the Encyclopaedia Starvillica. Patrick recruits Sandy, Mr. Krabs and also Tattletale Strangler to make the encyclopedia. Strangler hires a group of thugs to kill Patrick while he is reviewing Strangler's revisions, but the thugs are instead recruited by Krabs as he hunts for the supposedly magical Crystal of Starville in the forests near Starville, further delaying the encyclopedia's completion.

First appearance: Mr. Krabs (present-day).

19. You Furnish the Paper, I Furnish the Chaos: As a result of sagging sales, Jay Giftstar starts the Giftstar Examiner newspaper to make sensationalist and highly unrealistic articles about the gifts in the shop while revealing highly-classified government "trade" information. When collectors from all over the seas come to take the government's (instead of the shop's) belongings, Mayor MacStar declares martial law and Patrick is sent to persuade the Mayor to change his mind.

20. Riding the Stupidity Wave: Jockcar and Sons Company is asked to make a limousine for the Mayor and Vice-Mayor. They recruit Patrick (seen as an ideal designer) to make the limousine. Despite having a reported value of US$1.500.000, Patrick's limousine turns out to be a monstrosity, with an extremely noise engine, nearly nonfunctional steering, leaking roof, a radio only able to produce a noisy "Ooooo" sound and bright light from lamps causing temporary blindness. The company declares bankruptcy and Patrick returns to the gift shop.

First appearance: Jockcar and Sons Company, Javier Greenstar, Millie Greenstar, Silius Sconstar, Alastair's Robot, Old Man Jenkins.

Season 2
21. I, Tattletale Strangler: In this 1-hour TV movie, follow the rise of Tattletale Strangler from an impoverished little boy in Bikini Bottom to one of the most prominent crime figures and the Vice-Mayor of Starville from the viewpoint of the Strangler himself.

22. Hey, Old Man Jenkins!: Old Man Jenkins is arrested after being accused of robbery in Starville. Patrick becomes his lawyer and in the court he starts making "stupid" statements about Old Man Jenkins which leads Judge Pietro MacFish to think that Jenkins is "unsuitable" for a robbery and frees him.

23. The Great Clash: Reality vs. Fiction: Patrick, Mayor Alastair and Vice-Mayor Strangler sues LKAD for exploiting them. LKAD then rallies Stephen Hillenburg and Derek Drymon to his cause. Hillenburg becomes involved in a taunting match with Dr. Milton Sumter, Patrick's lawyer. Strangler attacks LKAD and a brawl ensues. Judge Pietro MacFish declares the case closed and orders all records of the court session destroyed.

First appearance: Dr. Milton Sumter.

24. Sir Dead or Alive: Mr. Krabs comes to visit Patrick, and forces him to make an internationally-televised broadcast on TV Starville declaring his wishes to have his money in his grave when he dies. The next day, viewers protest and demand Krabs' arrest for "being cheap to the grave".

First appearance: Marty O. Jonstar, TV Starville.

25. Big Pizza Splash: While creating the Starville Special Pizza following the "Guide to Making Starville Pizzas", Patrick forgets to add the "green spice" and unassumingly adds "red Philippine sauce" followed by boiling water and eats it. The next day, feeling unwell, Patrick is told by doctors that he has created a bomb which is to detonate in 5 hours, and an emergency surgery is held to have the bomb extracted.

26. Two Squids For Two Reasons: Squidward and Squilliam become the first two squids to live in Starville; Squidward to attend James Clarinetstar's class and Squilliam to take over the nearby copper mine.

27. The Fall and Rise of James Clarinetstar: James Clarinetstar's class is closed due to budget cuts. Squidward and Patrick reluctantly work together to have the class resurrected.

28. A History of Chaos and Happiness: Mayor Alastair MacFish tells Patrick, Squidward and Squilliam the "chaotic and happy" history of Starville after its establishment by the 7 starfish patriarchs in 1924.

29. Squilliam in on Mine: Workers in the copper mine go on strike after Squilliam refuses to pay them money. When Squilliam is "arrested" by the miners, Squidward and Patrick try to rescue him, with some help from a very reluctant Tattletale Strangler.

30. Patrick and Friends in Chernobyl: Part 1: Going on a venture with Sandy, SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs to "human land", Patrick tours Chernobyl and, without knowledge of authorities, slip into the remote corners of the power plant with his friends. Unfortunately, due to "playing" with the buttons, Patrick activates all reactors and then starts a massive meltdown.

31. Patrick and Friends in Chernobyl: Part 2: All reactors suffer a meltdown. The city of Kiev is evacuated along with Patrick, Sandy, SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs. Feeling guilty, Patrick disembarks to extinguish the fire, and the others chase him from behind, trying to stop him from going.

32. Patrick and Friends in Chernobyl: Part 3: Patrick steals protective clothing and equipment from several firefighters, who then chase him along with Patrick's friends. Patrick then extinguishes the massive fire in Chernobyl. He and his friends are sentenced to life in prison, but Mayor Alastair comes and secures their release, and return to the underwater.

33. Outrageously Fancy with Squilliam Fancyson: Squilliam has his own talk show in TV Starville, called Outrageously Fancy with Squilliam Fancyson. Watching Squilliam act as both the host and guest, Squidward decides to show off his "artistic" skills and storms into the show, causing a disturbance.

34. Patrick, Tattletale and the Barbarians: Going on a trip to the forests near Starville, Patrick and Tattletale Strangler are separated from the others and end up in a barbarian society. Tattletale finds it easy to adapt, and he uses the tribal chief to ensure Patrick's removal, but some tribesmen hear of this plan and protect Patrick from harm. Meanwhile, Squilliam buys fancy clothes.

35. Resurrect for Reborn: Squilliam dies drinking a poisonous Caffeine-Free Pepsi in a can while doing a commercial with P.E.P.S.I. Hooray and the Tay siblings. The Flying Dutchman agrees to resurrect Squilliam, but he must never again be cheap. Squilliam finds it difficult not to break this pledge.

First appearance: The Flying Dutchman.

36. Behold the Pantheon: Squidward is arrested by King Neptune's Divine Army after insulting Neptune for "not having the artistic skills of mine" and brought to Atlantis. With SpongeBob's help from Bikini Bottom, Patrick and Mayor Alastair prepare a statement defending Squidward, but Squilliam is bribing the judges in an attempt to have Squidward frozen to death.

First appearance: King Neptune, Princess Mindy.

37. Honoring Swat: Patrick is sent as a "goodwill ambassador" to the nearby Sultanate of Swat. However, Sultan Ruth throws Patrick to jail as a result of "stupid and inappropriate conduct" and wages war against the "stupids" in Starville. Feeling guilty, Patrick escapes from jail and tries to stop the Swatians from invading Starville.

First appearance: Sultan Ruth.

38. Finally to the Class: Squidward finally attends James Clarinetstar's clarinet class in the Clarinet Palace with Patrick and Judge Pietro MacFish, but it turns out that James is suffering from exhaustion, so Squilliam is brought in as a temporary replacement.

39. No More Star: Patrick is fired after using so-called "alternative words" which turn out to be Starville-style insults. Determined to get his job, Patrick starts composing a "Dictionary of the One True and Righteous Style of Words for Starville". Eventually, Patrick is rehired in the gift shop.

40. Professor of Decoration: Mayor MacFish and Vice-Mayor Strangler decide that the House of the Mayor needs to be redecorated, and Squidward steps in, having recruited Patrick and Selma Clarinetstar to his cause.

Season 3
41. Anger and Snowshoes: As Strangler tries to create a poison to weaken Patrick, he suddenly creates a highly-dangerous chemical which, after being exposed to elements of environment, turns the land around Starville into a complete winter wasteland. As people throw snowshoes as a sign of protest, Strangler reluctantly turns to Patrick to campaign for "redemption and forgiveness".

42. Reform-what?: At his robot and Patrick's suggestion, Mayor Alastair declares the 10 Laws of Reform to improve civil and human rights. Unfortunately, the Mayor is overthrown by mob rule, and Strangler seizes this chance to gain power "temporarily". Patrick, Squidward and Squilliam come to the rescue.

43. Turn Around and Run: Mayor Alastair, Vice-Mayor Strangler and Patrick race to be the first to run around the House of the Mayor 100 times in a row.

44. To the Mariana Trench: Old Man Jenkins defies old age as he leads Patrick and some adventurous citizens from Starville as they explore the Mariana Trench.

45. Citizens Day: On Citizens Day, Patrick and Squidward are banished from Starville for refusing to do community service like all other citizens, and they look for a way to return to Starville.

'''46. Banish! Banish!''': Mayor Alastair decides that non-starfishes are destroying Starville's "culture" and orders their banishment from Starville. Squidward, Squilliam, Old Man Jenkins and even Alastair's robot (who is granted an exception) protest.

47. Mistaken Charity: Patrick mistakes a group of gangsters for a charity foundation, so when people start hating him for giving money to gangsters, Patrick runs away from Starville.

48. On Our Past: Patrick and Mayor Alastair visit the sunken ships on the seafloor around Bikini Atoll.

49. The Sale of Copper: After yet another dispute with miners, Squilliam is forced to close down his copper mine and falls into poverty. After being convinced by Patrick, Squidward comes to help Squilliam regain his copper mine.

50. Patrick the Historian: After reading several history books, Patrick becomes a historian, but he finds it hard to keep his job.

51. In the Name of No Neptune: When a thief tries to steal from Patrick's house, Patrick mistakes him for the God and worships him, followed by other citizens. Angered that he is no longer worshiped there, King Neptune comes with his warriors to punish Starville's citizens for their transgression.

52. The Official Virus-Producing Website: At Mayor Alastair's encouragement, Starville's very few computer programmers create an official website for the government, but when over 3000 viruses across the world are reported to come from the website, Alastair is forced to speak before the United Nations in New York City.

53. Patrick's YouTube: Patrick somehow gains a lot of money from the First Nautical Bank back in Bikini Bottom and buys YouTube, moving all its human employees underwater to the House of the Mayor in Starville. Mayor Alastair and Vice Mayor Strangler try to remove the employees from their official residence.

First appearance: YouTube.

54. Big Time Wrestling: Squidward tries his hand at promoting wrestling fights in the brand-new Starville Astrodome.

55. You Know It When...: Vice-Mayor Strangler is known to have lots of secrets. Patrick, working together with Uno the Sea Dragon, tries to uncover the secrets.

56. You're Done, Uno: Uno the Sea Dragon is falsely accused by Vice-Mayor Strangler of being involved in a corruption case in an attempt to demoralize Uno's friend Patrick. With the help of a now-athletic Old Man Jenkins, Patrick attempts to stop Uno's scheduled hanging outside the House of the Mayor.

57. Warming the World: Mayor Alastair teaches viewers all about global warming.

Note: This episode is non-canon.

58. Burn the Bakery: Patrick invents some new cakes and opens a bakery of his own, but when all the cakes turn out to be poisonous, the angry citizens arrive to burn Patrick's bakery.

59. Yes Sir, I Know: After ridiculing a group of "strange-clothing people", Patrick accepts their challenge to a street fight. Recruiting a reluctant Strangler, Patrick doesn't know that he's dealing with a crime syndicate, and that the cops are secretly observing the fight.

60. World Journey of Enlightenment: Jay and Mary-Sue Giftstar get into a fight and file for divorce. Horrified, Patrick and Uno consult Father Jay Rollofish, who takes Patrick, Uno, Jay and Mary-Sue on a "round-the-world journey for enlightenment" in an attempt to halt the divorce.

First appearance: Father Jay Rollofish.

Season 4
61. Ring of Destruction: Patrick finds a magical ring in the nearby Cave of Horror. The ring, which is cursed, turns out to be destructive, as Starville is reduced to rubble and its citizens flee in a mass exodus. Patrick tries to find a way to destroy the magical ring.

62. It's All Squilliam's Balloon: Squilliam invites Patrick, Squidward and Old Man Jenkins to the first flight of his all-new "Royale" balloon. However, ignoring advice from his crew, the arrogant Squilliam leads his balloon to a crash amid bad weather in the Altamei Mountains, and the group have to find their way back to civilization.

63. The Dancer and The Cheater: Part 1: Patrick and Mayor Alastair organize the Starville Dance Competition, and Squidward (despite his lackluster skills) and Squilliam (thanks to both good performance and bribing) are the finalists. Both finalists send spies to observe each other's moves, but Old Man Jenkins discovers this.

64. The Dancer and The Cheater: Part 2: After 2 days of cheating in training, Squidward and Squilliam are angry that the competition is declared a draw and send their spies in to a brawl. Squilliam's stronger spies win and Squilliam declares himself the winner, but Old Man Jenkins appears and provides evidence of cheating, which leads to both finalists being arrested and the competition aborted.

65. Chaos on Arbor Day: On Arbor Day, Patrick foolishly cuts down the trees in Starville, having assumed that they generate too much pollution.