O My God

O My God is the eighteenth episode of Total Drama SBFW. It aired September 29, 2019 and was written by Purple133.

Transcript
(Episode begins with Vanessa confessional)

Vanessa: Yeah, we probably should have told more people to vote Joey. Oh well!

(Cut to Joey talking to Dan)

Joey: Hey I know we hate each other but what if we suddenly worked together?

Dan: And why would we do that?

Joey: To take out Crazy?

Dan: Well I guess so.

(Dan confessional)

Dan: Anybody who thinks it’s okay to jack off into a sock has to be the next to be eliminated.

(Purps confessional)

Purps: Hey is this season gonna have 27 episodes?

(Cut to Purps talking to Bot)

Bot: What do you want?

Purps: I was wondering if maybe we could work together?

Botpoo: Sure I guess. Anything to get away from… him..

Cici: And so I said, “but you forgot the milk!” Oh hahahahaha!

Purps: (quietly to Bot) is he okay?

Bot: He’s been like that for days.

Cici: UMG UMG UMG!

Bot: I don’t know what’s going on, but HE HAS FUCKING LOST IT.

Cici: OH HEY GUYS!

Purps: I’m gonna go away now.

(Cut to the challenge)

Alex: Today, we’re doing a fun challenge that you’re all going to love.

Purps: Doubt it.

Image: Seriously I doubt it.

Vanessa: Well, what is the challenge?

Alex: A game of hide and seek! Waluigi will be hunting you down as you all hide in different locations around the building. Last person to be found wins!

Waluigi: I’m counting to 100! WAH!

Crazy: Was that go?

Jasbre: I think so.

(Jasbre confessional)

Jasbre: No way he actually manages to find me.

(Jasbre hides inside of a large safe in the basement behind a shelf and under a blanket that was already there and out of place; cut to Vanessa hiding)

Vanessa: Dammit there’s literally nowhere to hide!

Waluigi: WAH! 50 seconds left!

Vanessa: DAMMIT!

(Cut to Bot trying to hide)

Bot: I’m just going to turn on my chameleon feature.

(Cici licks Bot thinking he’s part of the wall)

Bot: Cici can I please ask you what’s going on?

(Inside Cici’s head)

Cici 1: Hey guys should we have flipped this switch?

Cici 2: No, probably not.

Cici 3: Well why did you flip it to begin with?

Cici 1: It looked cool.

Cici 4 You fucking idiots you turned off his mind. He hasn’t been in control since like a couple days ago.

Cici 2: Ohhhhhh.

(Cici 3 flips the switch back, cut to the real world)

Cici: Huh? Bot what’s going on?

Bot: Oh, you’re back. Hide!

Waluigi: READY OR NOT HERE I COME!

Purps: DAMMIT!

Waluigi: Purps you already lost why didn’t you move?

Purps: I didn’t feel like it.

Waluigi: WAH! Well you lose. Dan I can see you!

Dan: Goddammit!

(Dan is “hiding” next to a lamp)

Waluigi: Almost as nada hiding spot as Purps. Well time to go upstairs!

(Waluigi walks upstairs and instantly finds Vanessa, who is just standing in a hallway)

Waluigi: Vanessa you get an award for the single worst hiding spot.

Vanessa: Gee, thanks.

Waluigi: WAH! Three out of the nine of you are out!

Purps: Oof.

Waluigi: I’M GONNA GET YOU!

(Somebody sneezes)

Waluigi: (kicks over flower pot) FOUND YOU IMAGE!

Image: Come on!

Waluigi: My senses indicate that Cici is hidden.

Purps: What senses you just haven’t found him yet.

Waluigi: Shut up! WAH!

(Waluigi finds Cici standing next to an odd patch of wall that is slightly off colored from the rest; how weird)

Waluigi: WAH! Cici, you’re out. We’re down to Bot, Crazy, Jasbre, and Joey.

Waluigi: Speaking of Crazy, I see him now trying to be sneaky.

Crazy: o my god.

Waluigi: NONE OF THAT ON MY CHRISTIAN MINECRAFT SERVER!

Purps: Wait wh-

Waluigi: SHUT THE FUCK UP! Also I see Joey.

Joey: What? DAMMIT NOT ME TOO!

Waluigi: See, I’m just that good.

Joey: I guess so.

Waluigi: Well Bot and Jasbre are both exceptionally great hiders, but I will find them eventually.

Bot: No you won’t.

Waluigi: WAH! WHO SAID THAT?!

Bot: Just me.

Waluigi: WHERE ARE YOU?!

(Waluigi punches the wall and hits Bot)

Waluigi: OH FUCK I BROKE THE CONTRACT WAHHHHH

Bot: I’M SUING YOUR ASS GODDAMMIT

Jasbre: (comes out of hiding) I win!

Waluigi: Yes you do.

(Cut to a Jasbre confessional)

Jasbre: This is nice, I have a free pass to the final eight.

(Cut to Purps and Crazy talking)

Crazy: So who are you voting?

Purps: I dunno man. Maybe Dan?

(Purps confessional)

Purps: Crazy can’t even tell I’m lying to him. He’s gone.

(Cut to Jasbre and Vanessa talking)

Vanessa: So what’s up?

Jasbre: Nothing.

Vanessa: Okay then.

(Joe confessional)

Joey: I don’t know what’s going on but I’m pretty sure we have to vote Crazy off. Or Dan was saying we should.

(Dan and Joey talking)

Dan: Yeah so I’m not trying to sound bossy, but voting Crazy would be in our best interest.

Joey: That sounds very bossy.

Dan: Sorry. Please vote Crazy?

Joey: Well you said please soooo okay!

(Cut to the elimination ceremony)

Alex: Alright people go vote.

(Crazy voting)

Crazy: I’m very nervous about this one.

(Dan voting)

Dan: Why does this episode feel shorter than usual?

(Image voting)

Image: Yes.

(Cut back to the ceremony)

Alex: Alright here’s who’s safe. Jasbre, Bot, Cici.

Cici: Nice.

Alex: Vanessa, Image, Joey.

Image: Oh okay.

Alex: Now we’re down to our final three. One of you got no votes, and that was Purps.

Purps: Oh yeah.

Alex: Good for you. Dan, Crazy, once again it’s you two in the bottom.

Crazy: Seriously guts?

Alex: Neither of you really have good reason to stay. Dan’s been like being a big target for a while, and so has Crazy. It was really only a matter of time before you both ended up down here.

Waluigi: WAH! GET ON WITH IT DAMMIT.

Alex: Dan is safe.

Crazy: BULLSHIT!

Waluigi: Crazy, your time is finally up.

(Crazy punches Waluigi)

Crazy: O my god I didn’t mean-

Waluigi: WAH!

(Waluigi beats the ever loving shit out of Crazy and drags him off to the lounge of losers)

Alex: And now we’re down to our final eight. See you guys at the next challenge!