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Rated C - Ages 13 and up

This article is rated C, meaning it contains content that may be inappropriate for users under the age of 13.
Objectionable content includes: Strong language, sexual references

That Damn Squid
That Damn Squid.png
Series Livin' With The Squid
Season 1
Episode 23
Airdate August 6, 2015
Production company Pineapple Entertainment
Story by The Terrible Travis
Written by The Terrible Travis
Title card by The Terrible Travis
Previous Episode Unlawful Laws
Next Episode The Good Old Days

That Damn Squid is the twenty-third episode of Livin' With The Squid.



Squidward, Michael, Daniel, Patrick, SpongeBob, and Technetium plan to take Squilliam down.


Squidward, Michael, Daniel, Patrick, SpongeBob, and Technetium had all been sitting in a jail cell. "Why he'd put all us in one jail cell?" Technetium asked. "Because Squidward's a bitch," Squidward muttered. "He's my bitch," said Squilvia seductively. The prisoners' eyes widened, all of them turning towards her. "When'd you get here?" SpongeBob asked. "I appear whenever the joke requires me. And then I just disapear..." Squilvia explained as she began to fade away. The characters blinked continuing to stare at where she once stood. 

Squidward once used to live in Bikini Bottom

With neighbors SpongeBob and Patrick

But then he had enough

He couldn’t take them anymore

So he moved to Coral City

And well now let’s just say

It couldn’t have gotten any worse!

Squidward had been in the prison shower, washing himself off. "Mhm, mhm. Canned Bread scented soap. The people in this prison sure have good taste," he commented, deeply smelling the soap. However, it then slipped out of his tentacle. "Ugh, not again," he muttered, reaching down for that. His eyes soon widen, a high-pitched yelp escaping his mouth. He then turned around, finding Squilvia's nose dug deep into his retcum, much to his horror. "Gah! Get your nose out of my ass!" he growled, quickly pulling her out. 

"Sorry, Squidward! It just smells so good!" Squivia apoligized. "I hate you," Squidward said dryly. "Aw, I love you too honey!" Squilvia grinned. "Shut up," Squidward said, walking out of the shower. Squilvia soon followed him. "Would you quit following me?" Squidward asked. "No," Squivlia replied. "Ugh," Squidward faceplamed. "So, uh, how exactly are we going to get out of this jail again?" Patrick asked. "We're going to need a carefully executed plan. Why, it could take hours to even just think of the plan!" Michael said. 

Suddenly, Squilvia began to fade away again. "Hop on!" Techneitum shouted, all the characters quickly hopping onto her. They soon began to fade away, eventually appearing in Squilvia's house. "Hey, you stole my lingerie!" Patrick growled, pointing to a pile of lingerie. "No, I let you borrow those. Remember?" Squilvia said. "Oh, right," Patrick realized. "Can I borrow it next?" Daniel asked. 

                                     Coral City Prison

"They escaped?!" Squilliam panicked. "That's what I just said," Officer John said dryly. "Well, then find them!" Squlliam ordered. "How do we do that?" Officer Nancy asked. "Figure it out yourself!" he growled. "Yes, sir!" Officer John said, the two of them quickly running out the building. "So...what now?" Officer Nancy asked. "Wanna go to the Krusty Krab?" he said, answering with another question. "Sure!" Officer Nancy grinned, the two of them walking off together. 

Suddenly, Anti-Fancyson burst into the prison. "Oh, you guys came back. Good," Squilliam said. "Not so fast, Squilliam! We came to take you down!" SpongeBob announced. "Wait a minute. Take him down? I thought we came here to steal all the Canned Bread scented soap," Patrick said, confused. "That too!" Squidward grinned. "You're stealing my soap?! Officer John! Officer Nancy! Come get these guys immediately!" Squilliam ordered. 

                                     The Krusty Krab

"And would you like fries with that?" Sheldon asked the two.

                                    Coral City Prison

"Well, they're fired," Squilliam muttered. "Alright, Squilliam. This is your last chance. Resign from your position as mayor or else," Michael warned. "Pft, or else what?" Squilliam asked, crossing his arms. "OR ELSE I'LL SMASH YOUR FACE!" Daniel threatened. "Gah! Okay, okay! I'll resign! I'll resign! Just don't steal my Canned Bread scented soap!" Squilliam surrended, shaking in fear. 

                                     City Hall

"Greetings, citizens of Coral City. It has been brought to my attention that unfrotunately I am not fit to be mayor. I've mad much too many mistakes and therefore resign from my position. Here to take my place will be Charlie Bluefish. Thank you all very much for listening," Squilliam announced, before realizing that there was no one there.

The members of Anti-Fancyson soon walked over to him, clapping. "Well done, Squilliam! It's great to see that you were able to confess to your mistakes!" SpongeBob congratulated. "Even if we had to threaten to murder you to get you to do it," Daniel said. "So...where's my Canned Bread scented soap?" Squilliam asked. 

The camera then cut to Squidward. He quickly hopped into a boatmobile full of Canned Bread scented soap, driving off into the distance. "MY SOAP!!! I'm reporting you guys for robbery!" he growled. Technetium then took out a frying pan, knocking him out with it. "Where'd you get that frying pan?" SpongeBob asked. "I stole it from prison," Technetium. 


  • This is the first episode to contain a cuss word in the title. 
Livin' With The Squid Season 1

Movin' Out Of Bikini BottomCinnamon Breath SprayGirls Just Want To Have SexRed MistKrusty Kourt KaseFrom The SurfaceHallohateMayor SquidPatrick's JellyfishReality SquidThe Battle Continues...Turkey HuntTurning Into PatrickSaint StarfishMovin' BackDiscoveriesKrabsBack To NormalFortune Cookies Can't Be TrustedNew WorkerLivin' With The RetiredUnlawful LawsThat Damn SquidThe Good Old DaysBest EmployeeThe Squidward EffectHallohate 2: Haunted HouseSchool StarSea SéanceInternet Stalker ForumsSquidward's SuicideViciously Murdering Ourselves So We Can Get Our House BackThe Lost SnailSponge SwarmDelegate-lemmaBack To Hell (Not The Fanon Wiki)