A rating
Rated A - All Ages

This article is rated A, meaning it is appropriate for all ages.

Absorbent Days presents Wrap It Up!


Wrap It Up!
  • [short begins at the Barg N' Mart; SpongeBob is walking inside, looking around]
  • SpongeBob: What would he want? [rubs chin] That fancy snail earl bath remedy or the cheese-covered chocolate-coated clam chips? [rubs head] Hmm. So many decisions. [looks up] I really need some hair.
  • Male Store Employee: Excuse me, sir. Is there anything I can help you with?
  • SpongeBob: Yes, there actually is. Do you have any "The Best Gift For Your Pet Snail's Birthday"s in stock?
  • Male Store Employee: Nope. Sold the last one less than a minute ago. [points to empty shelf]
  • Customer: [walks into scene] This gift was the worst thing I've ever bought! This thing was made for snails! Not eels! [calms for a second] In retrospect, I should have seen the signs on the box...[angers again] but I choose to blame it on...[decides between SpongeBob or Male Store Employee; chooses Male Store Employee] You! [throws item at Male Store Employee; stomps away] Son of a clam-shell...!
  • SpongeBob: [takes item] Hey, here's one! [runs to checkout line] This will be perfect for Gary! [stops at last in line] All I have to do is make a fast checkout. [looks at line, which wraps around the entire store] Whoa, this line is kind of long. I'm never going to get home by four. And if I do, it'll be four next week. What am I going to do?
  • Gift Item: [mechanically] Don't worry. I got this. [morphs into bowling ball]
  • SpongeBob: Wow. It talks and can morph into anything! At least that's what it says on the box. [rolls ball] Go get 'em!
  • Gift Item: [rolls through the line; knocks through the entire line of fish out of the way; rolls back to SpongeBob] The line has been cleared.
  • SpongeBob: Whoa, that was fast. But gosh, the line must have stretched far. I must be a whole mile from the register. [sighs]
  • Gift Item: No need to worry. Morphing into...[morphs into sports car] a sports car! Hop on...uh...whatever your name is.
  • SpongeBob: Well, okay. [hops into sports car] Let's burn some...[sports car zooms down the store] rubber! [camera closes up to SpongeBob's face] Whoo hoo! Yeah! This is fun! I never want to stop! [camera zooms out to the entire sports car, which has stopped]
  • Gift Item: We already stopped, soon-to-be owner. [morphs back into gift item] Shall we purchase me now?
  • SpongeBob: Yep. [places on counter] I would like to purchase this item, clerk.
  • Clerk: [annoyed] I understand. [scans item] There, you've purchased it. Now get out of here!
  • SpongeBob: But don't I have to give you some clams or scan my Master Clam card?
  • Clerk: [throws SpongeBob and the gift out of the scene] Nope! Get out of my store!
  • Manager: [walks up to clerk] You just let a customer leave the store without paying! And this is not your store, it's mine!
  • Clerk: [sighs] Let it go, Richard.
  • [scene cuts to SpongeBob's living room; he has set the gift on the coffee table, adoring it]
  • SpongeBob: Ooh, Gary is going to love this! Just wait until he sees it! He must see it! I must force him to see it!
  • Gary: [offscreen] Meow meow!
  • SpongeBob: Oh no! Gary! He's coming. I can't let him see this! [grabs towel] We have to cover you up now, or else the gift surprise will be ruined tomorrow! [attempts to place towel over gift]
  • Gift Item: [hops out of way] No! [lands on couch] SpongeBob, I should have told you this earlier, but...I hate being undercover. It's dark under there. I'm a gift who doesn't want to be wrapped! What kind of gift is that?
  • SpongeBob: Uh oh! [hears approaching Gary; looks at hallway, then back at gift; repeats] What am I going to do?!
  • [To be continued...]

Absorbent Days Blog Series Episodes
Blabber MouthAn Absorbent MemoryFalse RealityWrap It Up!Wrap It Up! - Part Two: Keep It Under WrapsWrap It Up! - Part Three: Birthday TwistStuck in the Krusty KrabA Star GardenAn Absorbent Veteran
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